🍆 crochet dick plushie 🍆
Hand-stitched with too much love and probably a little pent-up sexual frustration, this lil' yarn schlong is the emotional support peen you never knew you needed. Perfect for hurling across the room during a mental breakdown or gently patting your face while whispering, “shhh, men aren’t real.”
Features: – Cuddly enough to cry into – Sturdy enough to slap your ex’s memory away – Anatomically inaccurate (but in a cute way) $19.99
🤡 Unhinged Beanie 🤡
For when you know you’re the clown… so you might as well accessorize. This chaotic headpiece is hand-crocheted with unhinged precision and rainbow regret. Whether you’re simping over a situationship, making bad decisions at 2am, or just vibing with your delusions — this hat says, “Yeah, I’m emotionally unstable, but I’m also adorable.” $24.99
🖤 BDSM CROCHET HANDCUFFS 🖤
Warm, soft, and full of questions. $14.99